Anxiety - Story, Devotional, Encouragement
PLANES AND AISLE SEATS
It's something for which I am grateful - I've been on well over three hundred flights. Most were as a traveler on commercial airlines, and many were as the pilot in command of a lunch box with a propeller, also known as single-engine aircraft. It is a privilege because I have never been forced to fly like the business travelers I sympathize with. They are forced weekly to leave their loved ones and enter into the ceaseless dance of inching forward through TSA lines and the perpetual race against time to find an open power outlet. Although I have experienced those things, my choice to travel has always been mine.
Air travel is something I always enjoy on one condition - I must have an aisle seat! Snagging an aisle seat is a golden ticket to freedom. No more feeling trapped like a sardine in a tin can with the lid still rolled shut. Need to stretch those legs? No problem! You can pop up into the aisle without disturbing a single soul. And let's remember the ease of accessing the bathroom (I drink 2 gallons of water daily). The aisle also puts me in a prime position for mid-flight strolls, which can be a lifesaver on those flights over 90 minutes. Trust me, once you've tasted the sweet nectar of the aisle life, there's no going back!
I fly Delta because they serve the places I fly and have the best track record of the fewest cancellations and delays. I book my flights through the Delta App and always book an aisle seat or don't book the flight. Here is where my Delta issue comes in. They have a system problem. For a flight in October of 2022, I booked a coach aisle seat from ATL to CMH, a 90-minute flight. But, because I am a Delta Gold Medallion Frequent Flier, they gave me a free upgrade to a Delta Comfort seat…a window seat.
DELTA UPGRADE PROBLEM
I sat at the window and was delighted to have the extra legroom. Then as we continued to board, the guy arrived to take his seat in the aisle of my row. He was about six feet tall and looked like Danny Davito after a weekend of binge drinking. My point, this guy did not look like a fast mover. Then the second guy took the middle seat. This guy was built just like Russell Crowe. Not "Gladiator" Russell Crowe, more like "Unhinged" Russell Crowe, where he played the character of an overweight, road-raging killer, Tom Cooper.
Ugh, I, an aisle-only guy, was wedged against the window, with Delta thinking they had done me a favor. My personal space had been invaded by an army of elbows and knees with no escape route. I felt the walls closing in. My heart started racing. I had just been forced into a claustrophobia-inducing game of airplane row Tetris that I couldn't win—an experience I had never had.
MENTAL GYMNASTICS
The self-talk started, "Greg, you're not weak. Your mind is strong. This is just 90 minutes. Seal-Team up." I was trying to outrun the feeling of being trapped. My breathing turned shallow. Also, something else that had never happened to me. I was stuck in this never-ending loop of silent pleas for just an inch more space. It was a full-blown battle between my mind and my body, and all I could do was try to out mental gymnastics what was going on.
Ten minutes into this, I heard the familiar sound of the boarding door shutting. I couldn't believe how intense it was when I realized, at 53 years old, I was having my first (and I hoped the last) full-blown panic attack.
PANIC ATTACK
It was like my seatmates were prison guards who had hand-cuffed me to my Delta "Comfort" seat. My heart was pounding like a Sunday morning kick drum, and my thoughts were racing. I couldn't for the life of me control the flood of fear washing over me. My seat was a straightjacket. All I wanted was to escape this suffocating window seat nightmare that had become what felt to me like my prison of personal weakness.
The pilot had told us boarding was over, and the seatbelt light was now on. Internally, I freaked out. Externally, trying to hide what I felt was weakness, I leaned over with no emotion and said to the giants beside me, "Guys, I hate to do this, but I need to get out of this row, or I am going to pass out." From the calm look on my face, it didn't sound believable. But, thankfully, they responded to my words and not to the lack of emotion with which I spoke.
I got up as quickly as possible and stood in the aisle. Of course, a flight attendant made a beeline toward me. She is experienced with people. So, when she saw me jump up, I am sure her first thought was, "Shoot, I've got to deal with this non-compliant passenger now!"
She said, "Sir, did you hear the captain? You need to take your seat now."
I replied, "Mam, I am so sorry. I am not that guy. I had an aisle seat and got upgraded to a Comfort Plus Window seat, and I think I am having a panic attack for the first time in my life. Can I please have an aisle seat?"
Thankfully, with the best Delta customer service training, she said, "Absolutely, Sir. Everything is going to be okay. Let me take you back to an open Aisle seat."
As her words hit my ears, everything returned to normal inside me in seconds! Well, except for one thing. Now, I had to deal with the fact that I had experienced a panic attack. I was not too fond of that realization. I immediately thought of the hundreds of people I had counseled over the years who had told me about their anxiety and panic attacks. I was always sympathetic to their stories, prayed, and encouraged them to the best of my ability at the time. But now, I understand!
CLARITY AND COMFORT
I don't believe one has to experience what other people have gone through to disciple and love them through their circumstances. But wow, now I see the world of anxiety and panic attacks more clearly!
These familiar passages below have some truly comforting words for those of us who experience anxiety or panic attacks. Take Philippians 4:6-7, for example. It tells us not to be anxious about anything but instead to turn to prayer and let God's peace, which surpasses all understanding, guard our hearts and minds. It's a gentle reminder. Does this apply to window seats? I don't know. But I know those who suffer from anxiety do not have to do so alone! God and his church can walk with you on this journey. And then there's 1 Peter 5:7, which tells us to cast all our anxieties on God because He cares for us. It's like a divine invitation to trust that, ultimately, God will help you through these moments, and you can live a good life, even while working through anxiety.
Listen up, my friends with anxiety (and any issue others can't see). During this episode, I took action on advice I had given hundreds of times over the last 25 years. It's crucial to recognize that getting help starts with you. I get it; anxiety can be overwhelming, and reaching out for support might feel intimidating. But here's the thing: you are the captain of your ship, and only you can steer it towards calmer waters. Waiting for others to magically sense your struggles and offer help is not a reliable game plan. It's like expecting someone else to read your mind, and let's be honest, that rarely happens. So, take charge, my friend. Acknowledge that seeking help is a brave and proactive choice that empowers you to regain control over your anxiety.
When you actively pursue help, you're demonstrating strength and self-awareness. It's not a sign of weakness but a testament to your courage and determination. Don't let pride or fear hold you back. Your church is full of mature Christians who will encourage you through this battle. You're not alone! Seeking support doesn't mean burdening others; it means taking responsibility for your growth and seeking the assistance you need. Embrace the power of self-advocacy, and take that first step towards a future with less anxiety.
So, whenever you're feeling anxious, turn to these beautiful passages, and remind yourself that you're never alone, so speak your anxieties to God in prayer. Then, step out into the aisle and ask your faith community's "flight attendants" to help you!
©2023 Greg McNichols, All rights reserved.
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